Too Many Options

I have not been an official teacher for long, only 5 years, but I have worked in schools as a teacher’s aide, substitute, and a student teacher for about 10.  Teaching is my life. I’ve always known I would be a teacher, and I know I will always be in the field of education in some way.  But like many Millennials, I am discontent with doing the same thing each year.  That is why I don’t.  I will never be a teacher that repeats the same lesson or unit each year. I am an introvert at heart (even though my students balk at the idea that I could be an introvert), and so I thrive on creativity and thoughtfulness.  Honestly, I have never been much of a creative writer (fiction writer), but I have always been a writer.  My favorite types of writing have always been simple journaling or critical thinking-like picking apart bias and general academic expository writing.   Just recently I have realized my passion for curriculum writing, grant writing, and now blogging.

The instant gratification part of me needs feedback NOW!!  But the logical part of me realizes that I need to continue to write, after a few dozen posts, I may pay the extra money to start getting more readers, and continue to trudge through this difficult process while learning from each and every post and mistake.

As much as I don’t relate to most of the stereotypical millennial thinking, I have to admit that I am one. I fall on the earlier side of Millennials, and I was raised by my father who is a retired Sergeant Major in the Marine Corps and Vietnam Vet.  I have grown up with the blue collar worker mentality to earn what I get and work harder to earn more.  But as a Millennial want instant gratification and I want to change the world immediately or I lose drive and hope quickly.  But since I know I am this way, I fight my nature.  Each blog post I complete, I think about how this is just one small step toward one of my goals.    Whether this becomes a successful blog or not, I don’t know.  I hope it will become one but I can’t force people to want to read my ramblings.  But this is a means to an end of finding out exactly what and how I will be successful.

Today after church I started talking to a local natural grocery story owner, the only one in our town, and he recommended that I start listening to Sean Croxton- Quote of the Day.  He said that as an entrepreneur he has had to change his thinking about success. He has to constantly remind himself of what he wants and how he’s going to achieve it.  He knows that success won’t happen if he’s stagnant and negative.  I know that his store is very small but successful.  I attribute it to who he is.  He opened this store that provides something that this little town didn’t already have.  They didn’t have a natural grocery store.  But also he is a man of great integrity who takes amazing care of his family and is in the store carrying bags out for people and each day he spends his time chatting with his customers.  He is currently renovating a newer larger store to open in a few months. It’s been very interesting for me, as an observer, to see this process he and his store is going through during the past year or so.  They have hit so many road blocks, with the county, construction problems, and on but he is always positive and helpful to everyone he comes across.

NOW WHAT?

I have NEVER thought of myself as an entrepreneur until this year.  This desire has welled up in me to do more, be more, and know more.  I have to admit that I’m not content in the classroom.  I want to do more practical things for people who appreciate me and that I have the skills to make their dreams a reality.  Just in the past 3 weeks I have considered all the things that I want to do:

  1. Get my Masters in some sort of educational program:
    1. Leadership to be a teacher leader.  Most of the time these teacher leaders become principals but that sounds very scary to me.
    2. Technology and literacy: I want to know how to use technology to create wonderful curriculum that I can publish and sell.
    3. Curriculum development: I already have about 20 units that I can finish and publish.
  2. Get my PhD and help with the push toward school choice.
    1. Open up a school where we present a better balance of viewpoints, focus on morality, are proud Americans, and do projects do change our communities and our country. If I get my masters in Educational Leadership, this would be a natural next step.
  3. Go in a completely different direction: creative technology (website design and educational technology), business-focused writing, and be a freelance writer.  I realize it is possible for me to do this while doing the other things.

Now I could just simply go get another teaching job.  But then it would push all these goals farther and farther into the future.  The logical, single mom in me wants to put all this on hold.  But the entrepreneur in me wants to make 100k so that I can buy a nice house in San Diego and build a great life for my daughters.

QUESTIONS

Now, these are my options, what am I going to do about it?

  • Where should I go to school and what should I pick as my major?  Going to school for leadership (Principal education) scares me to no end.
  • How am I going to take care of my daughters in the process?
  • How long is it going to take to make all this schooling worth it?
  • What if everything falls apart?

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